I Am A Teenager

Sometimes I swear you only get the half about me,

Sometimes you get what’s really bothering me…

Sometimes, I don’t know, you get the truth as it is, you get me sad and gloomy, dark and dirty,

Lonely and empty…

Lost, distant and detached… wrecked.

Sometimes I give you me,

Other times I give you a happy me,

Most of the time I give you an understanding… but the thing is, nobody can understand what’s me…

Me is a monster inside,

Me is a lost pirate adjusting sails on rough tides,

Me is a scared little boy in a cold and empty room, naked as I weep in the corner,

Me is a lost parallel, me is a lost diagonal filtered into space…

Wondering in the space between nothing… the great gulf…

Me is just a depressed young teenager trying to fight the monsters in my head, the tangled emotions chained into my brain, the ones that make me cry because I can’t bear it anymore.

These are just the sounds of my bones when I choose to be strong and persevering, they remind me how weak I am when I am alone. They remind me of how scared I am, they remind me that I am human, that I am a teenager.

Siphumelele Nongwende

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